Monday, February 23, 2009


People walk into my office and often ask for "motivation." They are convinced this is what they need in order to exercise more. It is often talked about as if it were an item to be picked up at a store. And I think most buy into this notion that once the client/friend/patient is magically motivated they will begin a health program.

The only magic I have ever seen has occurred when the client decides the goal is worth it. The goal itself must evoke in you an emotion or desire. The drive to have it no matter what. That's the motivation. Otherwise the motivation is just a vague term that represents nothing. And the results will reflect that. Decide what you want. And make it meaningful. Make it motivate you.

Monday, February 16, 2009


Discipline is not something you are born with. It is a mental muscle that needs constant training. Like any other muscle, if you don’t use it, it will weaken. It takes more than just wanting to be disciplined. It is an ability that must be developed and tended to. If it appears easy for some, it is because those people have cultivated it for a very long time.

It isn’t something you can grab out of the top drawer when you need it. You have to have it ready when you need it. Begin slowly by creating a reward and consequence game for your behaviors.Remember no muscle gets into shape immediately. You have to methodically build it and maintain it. All your choices affect this muscle.
(taken from my book: "Head Over Meals-Thinking Your Way To Being Thin Happy & Healthy")

Monday, February 9, 2009


Approximately 88% of what you do on a regular daily basis is below your conscious awareness. It is automatic. You do not think about walking or driving. It is something you do automatically and unless something occurs that interrupts this habitual response, you will continue to do it routinely. You may think you are consciously aware, but the truth is most of the time you are on “auto pilot”. Habitual overeating, emotional eating , stopping at a drive thru is 75% habit control. To change eating patterns you have to choose to wake up.
And yes, even reaching for the box of chocolate because it's "Valentine's Day" is a habit. Let's face it, you can still have a great romantic evening without the chocolate. And if you are alone, the chocolate will NOT change that. Now I'm not saying it's a "bad thing" to be alone. It's neither good or bad. It just is. And it's only where you are now. Like habits--life's situations can be changed.

Monday, February 2, 2009


With Valentine's Day approaching, relationships become a primary focus. Every card store and flower shop is filled with the idea that every man and woman is madly in love. But for some, it is a painful reminder of being alone. Most people will resign to statements such as; "All the good ones are taken." "Why bother, sooner or later they cheat." Or even "I attract all the wrong ones"
If you are not in a relationship and you want to be, the fault may be in your beliefs and what you are projecting out. If you believe something to be true, you will find evidence to reinforce it.
Quantum physics has already showed that the scientist affects the outcome of the experiment just by what they expect to find. If you observe light as a wave, it behaves as a wave. If you observe light as a particle, it behaves as a particle.
The interaction of your observations and the filters of your perception affect everything you perceive. You, the observer, see what you expect to see. So if you believe that "all men are cheaters" or "woman only date rich men", you will find that to be true. You will find the evidence you need to make your belief true. And the cycle will continue.
And ask yourself this, if relationship are so "awful", then why do you want one? Perhaps if you focus on the things you do like, you might begin to attract something (someone) more positive.
Now I'm not saying that everyone should be in a relationship. Actually, you can learn something from your happy single friends. Simply be happy with what you do have. All too often people focus on what they don't have instead of what they do. If you are single you can enjoy being single. If you knew that in two years you would be married, you might be enjoying being single right now.
All too often people focus on what they don't have instead of enjoying what they do have. The key to lasting happiness is to enjoy the relationships when you are in one and enjoy being single when you are not. A mate does not determine your self worth, and will not solve a lack of self-esteem. You enter relationships because you want one, not because you need one.
Take responsibility for your actions and behavior. Ask yourself truthfully what have you been doing in your past relationships? Are you willing to change old patterns and beliefs that are no longer working for you? If you insist on being "needy" you will be by yourself. When it comes to relationships, two halves do not make a whole.
There are two things you inevitably attract in your life, the things you fear and the things you love. Why? Because you put a lot of energy into both. Typically, positive people attract positive things. And so the emotions you experience will attract people and events that will assist you in actualizing these emotions. For instance, what you fear will draw people to you that will help you perceive and experience those fears. On the positive side, focusing on the things that you love can make you irresistible. If you truly understand this, you will understand that if you want to find the "right" person, first look inside of you, and find your best. The rest will follow.