ARE YOU IN A BAD RELATIONSHIP?

Someone once said cake is like a bad relationship. It woos you with sweet nothings and leaves you unsatisfied and guilt ridden. I think this is an excellent anology. I would go one step further and say Sugar is like an abusive relationship. There might be a moment when things are great but it is very detrimental to the person. The pleasure is momentary and afterward the person is left feeling empty, and not very good about themselves. Think about what you would tell your best friend if you knew they were involved in a relationship that was harmful and ultimately could cause them physical harm. What if they told you " I can't help it. I'm in love."

Now think about your relationship with food. Are you that abused person? How long will you allow yourself to stay in the situation?

THE MOST IMPORTANT RELATIONSHIP

Good relationships start with good communication, but relatively few of us communicate effectively. Psychology teaches us that effective communication starts with the ability to create rapport.

Rapport is the state of ease and trust, where communication flows without resistance. You are naturally in rapport with 25% of the people you come in contact with. It doesn't happen consciously. When someone says "I feel like I've known you all my life" or "It's so easy to be with you," this is unconscious rapport.

Good communicators establish and maintain rapport unconsciously. You can create the same results through conscious awareness. This is important not just with relationships outside ourselves,nut the relationship we have with ourselves.

Most of us go about our day without communicating with our physical bodies. Without rapport, no meaningful exchange is possible. From a health point of view, you are more likely to make better choices when you bring the needs of your physical body to your conscious awareness.

Develop a more effective relationship with your physical body.

BE QUIET AND WORK OUT

Your best buddy may not be the best buddy to work out with. A great social friend is not always the right person to motivate you. It might be better to get with someone you admire or who will push you. Even better find someone who is more dedicated than you. It is better to have someone you feel you want to emulate or "be as good as."

Laughing and talking do not burn as much calories as working out. Consider the value of your work out time.If your work out buddy is more interested in chit-chat,arrange to socialize after. Your efforts effect your results.

CHAIN REACTION

You are undoubtedly familiar with the concept of cause and effect. This is a familiar concept in science, philosophy, and in all great teachings. Every effect has a cause, and every cause is the basis of an effect. There is a chain of causation: each effect is the result of a cause, which then becomes a cause for another effect. It is a cascade, or an ongoing loop. You might see it as two sides of an equation – a cause side and effect side.
This concept calls you to take responsibility because at any given moment you are on one side or the other, which in every moment is leading you to the other side . Therefore when you are fully present in any given moment, the question arises; Which side of the cause and effect equation are you on? Are you the CAUSE in your life or are you at the EFFECT of things in your life? If you are at CAUSE you take responsibility for things in your life. It is not about blame,but more so about taking action. Think of the word "responsible"--respond+able. You can choose how to respond to things in your life. Choose not to resort to food as an emotional blanket, choose to exercise rather than watch tv. Choose to focus on what you can do.

HOCUS POCUS FOCUS

One thing overweight people do best is compare themselves. I suppose that’s true for a majority of people as well. The comparison seems to be the basis of how people may view themselves. “My body will never look like that” or “I ran a mile but Bob ran two.” Healthy comparisons can be good. It can inspire you to move toward greater goals or take action toward improvements. However, if you don’t have confidence-comparing yourself can lead to less confidence. Most of the time the greatest improvements are made when you concentrate on your own achievements. Regardless of why you may compare yourself, ultimately it takes away from the one thing that does matter—what you want. I think it best to let go of any judgements, be clear about your desires, and focus focus focus.

GO AHEAD--UNDER INDULGE

Yesterday I was participating in celebrating Easter with a friend's family. I had just enjoyed a very nice dinner and was satisfied. Seeing that my plate was clean, the host asked if I wanted more food. I replied "No thank you. I'm fine." The next line is something that I have heard on several occasions--- "Oh c'mon it's Easter." Now you can insert any other event in place of the word Easter. As it is not an uncommon for me to hear it after I decline to eat more.

I am still confused as to why people equate the success of an event with the feeling of over indulgence. What does one have to do with the other? If I wanted to overeat I would not need a celebration to do so. If I chose to celebrate or dine with friends, I am enjoying their company. Subjecting my physical body to unnecessary work and pain takes away from my experience. I chose not to overeat and to pass on foods substances that I consider damaging to my body (i.e. too much sugar and salt) I would never insist on making that choice for someone else. They are responsible for themselves. But no one ever says "C'mon have a drink. It's your birthday" to an alcoholic.

SWEET VALENTINE

Are you spending Valentine's Day with a bad lover? Someone once said cake is like a bad relationship. It woos you with sweet nothings and leaves you unsatisfied and guilt ridden. I think this is an excellent anology. I would go one step further and say Sugar can be like a very abusive relationship. There might be a moment when things are great but it is very detrimental to the person. The pleasure is momentary and afterward the person is left feeling empty, and not very good about themselves. Think about what you would tell your best friend if you knew they were involved in a relationship that was harmful and ultimately could cause them physical harm. What if they told you " I can't help it. I'm in love."
Now think about your relationship with food. With chocolate? Are you that abused person? How long will you allow yourself to stay in the situation?

SINGLE AND IT'S VALENTINE'S DAY

With Valentine's Day approaching, relationships become a primary focus. Every card store and flower shop is filled with the idea that every man and woman is madly in love. But for some, it is a painful reminder of being alone. Most people will resign to statements such as; "All the good ones are taken." "Why bother, sooner or later they cheat." Or even "I attract all the wrong ones"
If you are not in a relationship and you want to be, the fault may be in your beliefs and what you are projecting out. If you believe something to be true, you will find evidence to reinforce it.
Quantum physics has already showed that the scientist affects the outcome of the experiment just by what they expect to find. If you observe light as a wave, it behaves as a wave. If you observe light as a particle, it behaves as a particle.
The interaction of your observations and the filters of your perception affect everything you perceive. You, the observer, see what you expect to see. So if you believe that "all men are cheaters" or "woman only date rich men", you will find that to be true. You will find the evidence you need to make your belief true. And the cycle will continue.
And ask yourself this, if relationship are so "awful", then why do you want one? Perhaps if you focus on the things you do like, you might begin to attract something (someone) more positive.
Now I'm not saying that everyone should be in a relationship. Actually, you can learn something from your happy single friends. Simply be happy with what you do have. All too often people focus on what they don't have instead of what they do. If you are single you can enjoy being single. If you knew that in two years you would be married, you might be enjoying being single right now.
All too often people focus on what they don't have instead of enjoying what they do have. The key to lasting happiness is to enjoy the relationships when you are in one and enjoy being single when you are not. A mate does not determine your self worth, and will not solve a lack of self-esteem. You enter relationships because you want one, not because you need one.
Take responsibility for your actions and behavior. Ask yourself truthfully what have you been doing in your past relationships? Are you willing to change old patterns and beliefs that are no longer working for you? If you insist on being "needy" you will be by yourself. When it comes to relationships, two halves do not make a whole.
There are two things you inevitably attract in your life, the things you fear and the things you love. Why? Because you put a lot of energy into both. Typically, positive people attract positive things. And so the emotions you experience will attract people and events that will assist you in actualizing these emotions. For instance, what you fear will draw people to you that will help you perceive and experience those fears. On the positive side, focusing on the things that you love can make you irresistible. If you truly understand this, you will understand that if you want to find the "right" person, first look inside of you, and find your best. The rest will follow.